Rubbernecking

I had to go out today a little after 4:00 PM. It was raining, but not bad enough to require anything other than intermittent wipers. I also happened to forget it was homecoming weekend at UGA. So it is a pretty fair bet to say that the population in town for the weekend is somewhere over 200,000 people. Normally we are around 80,000 with an additional 35,000 illegal aliens.

Having spent the last six or so years driving a minivan and a couple of SUV's, I guess I have become far more used to and comfortable with being in a large vehicle with very large crush zones. It was rather unnerving to be driving in traffic in a small Porsche again.

Normally at 4:00 in the afternoon, I can get from one side of the county to the other in about 20 minutes if I travel straight through town. If I take the interstate grade highway loop that goes around Athens, I could do it in maybe 10. Unfortunately, I had to go to a bank on the other side of town to drop off some additional paperwork regarding our construction on the burned house < aside, the credit market seems to be changing hourly>

At any rate, there isn't really anyway to go to that bank from my house other than the main road through town.

Let me offer my views on rubbernecking.

If you are a visitor from Tennessee and you have no idea where your hotel is and cannot seem to read all the multitudes of signs directing you to the campus- stop slowing down to ask traffic officers on the side of the road how to get to the RV parking lots. Further even with his advice, you seem to go out of your way to ignore his directions, upon which you then guide your 80 foot RV directly into downtown. A place even sub-compact cars have a problem navigating.

If you happen to be yet another Vanderbilt booster in yet another RV, and you SLOW DOWN to see if the RV in front of you got any info from the traffic cop with the blue lights flashing on his cruiser- DON"T slow down to 5 MPH in a 55 MPH zone. And if you happen to be a local yokel from Athens- REALIZE that the people driving the RV's are almost universally clueless as to where they are or where they need to go to begin 24 hours of tailgating. Get out of the way of these leviathans BEFORE they slam on their brakes to ask the cop where they are supposed to be.

If you are too stupid to be aware of the fact that every Fall, we get clueless drivers every couple of weeks, then for the love of God don't slow down just to observe the spectacle of yet another lost RV driver traveling in the opposite direction. This isn't even an event. You should know that they are lost. There are multiple WalMart parking lots available for them to wind up in. If they get hopelessly lost don't worry they will eventually have a safe place to stop, turn the 80 foot beast around, and look at a map.

If you are lucky enough to get past the endless line of RV stalls, and the people slowing down to look at them, then for God's sake please don't become mesmerized by the spectacle of two garbage trucks on main street stopping to pick up garbage. Pay attention to the street lights and keep moving. What should have been a 3 minute drive through downtown took me over 30 minutes because for some reason two garbage trucks picking up garbage in the rain is somehow a novel thing that must be looked at.

Then once that rubbernecking incident was over, I spent the next five miles nearly getting run over by Cadillac Escalades. All the while I was also having to avoid a never ending display of Vandy fans gawking at co-eds and slowing down to honk at each gaggle they passed on the side of the road. ACT like you have seen rain drenched females wearing white t-shirts before. Yes they have nipples under those shirts- and since this is one of the most liberal cities in the nation- most of them are not wearing bras.

What should have taken me maybe 30 minutes took me an hour and 20 minutes.

And almost all of it was due to rubbernecking.